“Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.”
Neale Donald Walsch
Chela
I have to admit it– I am afraid of living. Really living. I’ve long given up trying to find the “perfect life”. However, I’ve decided recently that I want to enjoy my life and live freely anyway, despite my fears.
I grew up in Thailand. Both in Bangkok and in the rice farming villages of Dad’s family in Isan, near the border of Laos. I moved to Seattle with my twin sister, Nu Neelu, as teens, when our mother was diagnosed with lung cancer and moved back to Seattle, after living in Thailand for twelve years. She didn’t even smoke! She died two months later. I don’t know how we survived the shock of losing our mother in a strange country filled with grief. We were kinda stuck here with no return ticket. My life took a dive I could not pull out of for many years.
It is challenging to live with an anxiety disorder. I want to be able to walk into a cafe and order a cup of hot coffee! Some days I live a little and some days I live a lot. I studied photography and documented my travels in Asia, Australia and the US. I was able, somehow, to travel. While being too anxious to relax in a coffeeshop or take a city bus without panic attacks. Back at home I needed help.
Flash forward twenty-plus years and my life is very different. Somewhere along the way friends introduced me to art, and I began to see more of the beauty around me. Help came in many ways, from other people and other beings. In 2018 I had surgery and treatment for breast cancer. Very recently my companion and Co-pilot, Holly, went through a jarring uprooting after decades in Seattle, moving from a two bedroom apartment to a 320 square foot fifth wheel trailer. Thanks to a friend, we were able to escape the urban life to fourteen acres of pasture, trees and slough. After some of the shock wore off, I began to see what a beautiful place we’ve landed in. We survived the first winter and weeks of snow without heat or running water to start a garden in the spring. Every time I’ve ever worked in a garden, it made me feel “oddly happy.” Now I have one of my own. Fun opportunities and meeting creative people inspired me to start doing art again. To sketch and paint and share my adventures or misadventures with my friends. I want to share my journey with you all.
Holly is and has been my Co-pilot on my journey for over 2 decades. She is an artist as well and we love to garden and cook. We will be sharing our life adventures with you.
We live in the Stillaguamish River Valley, about an hour North of Seattle.